Accelerates Under Demonic Influence
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented

Beautiful Mechanical Wonder
Big Money Works
Bought My Wife
Brutal Money Waster
Bimbette Motor Weapon
Break My Window		    

Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer

Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time

Darn Old Dirty Gas Eater
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere
Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Ex

Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix it again, Tony!

First On Recall Day
Factory Ordered Road Disaster
Forget On Race Day
Factory Ordered Rebuilt Dodge(Datsun)
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road Dead
Flip Over Read Directions
Four Old Rusted Doors
Fixed On Race Day
Fought Off Recall Demands
Found On Road Dying
First On Rust Development
Fork Over Repair Dough
Founded On Reservation Dump
Ford Owner Really Dumb
Fumes and Oders Readily Detectable 
Fast Only Rolling Downhill 
Flipped Over Roadside Disaster 
Found On Rubbish Dump 
Frequent Overhall, Rapid Deterioration 
Fix Or Repair Dilemma 
Fabricated Of Recycled Dung 
Flintstone Or Rubble Driven 
Fireball On Rear Denting 
Failure Of Reasearch and Development 
Forced On Reluctant Drivers 
Frequent Opinion: Really Disappointed 
Fails On Rainy Days 
First On Road to Dump 
For Old Retired Dudes 
Found On Roadside Dump 
For Only Retarded Drivers 
Ford Owners Recommend Dodge 
Flipped Over Russian Dunebuggy 
Found On Russian Dump 
For Off Road Death 
it Freaking Only Runs Downhill 
Fat Old Rusted Dog 
Freaking Old Rusted Dodge(Datsun) 
Frigin Oakies Really Dig it 
Funky Old Road Dog 
Found on Road Ditches 
Fails On Rainy Day 
Found Only 'Round' Dumps 
Found On Repairshop Driveway 
Forged Out of Recycled Dumpsters 
Fixed-up Old Repossesed Dodge 
Found Old Rebuilt Dodge 
Found On Railroad Dead 
Found On Railroad Deserted 
Forget OutRunning Dale 
Fools Only Read Directions

General Maintenance

Garage Man's Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?

Had One Never Did Again
Happy Owners Never Drive Anything else (Ken Shields view)

Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable And Inexpensive...

Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along

Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Every
 day.   
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover
 Equipment

Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown.
Sorry Arsed Auto Builders

Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto

Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners

Virtually Worthless